Loneliness is real and it affects many people from all walks of life every single day. It’s a longing for human interaction but I think that it’s not just with any old human – it’s to those who are close to you. You can be surrounded by people and still be lonely.
I think that I’m about to be hit with a huge wave of loneliness. My brain tells me I already have, but I think there’s more to come.
I should probably explain this.
In all of my fourteen years of education, I have never entered school without someone who I wanted to be with by my side. Even Reception, or Year Seven, or even Year Twelve – there was always someone that was there to reassure me that I wasn’t doing it alone. And I like that.
This year, academic year 2019/2020 is the first year I’m going in alone, with no one. If I was starting university, I’d be fine with it because it’s big and new and exciting – everyone’s in the exact same situation. But I’m not, I’m going to the same school I’ve been at for the past two years. The same school that I have been in with some of my closest friends for the past two years.
I feel like I’ve been left behind, even though I haven’t really. My friends all managed their A Levels in two years, so they get to move on with their education and their lives to university. And that means they have to move out of our town. I need to finish my A Levels if I want to continue on the same venture as them, so I must stay at school. I don’t envy them for leaving me. I can’t make them stay and I don’t want to stop them from going. In fact, I want them to go so that I can go and visit them and they can tell me stories from ‘the student halls’!
Going to college will be hard this year, I know. I want to go to learn the content and have the classroom experience. But the social side of it will be virtually (I do have SOME friends, but my best friends won’t be there anymore…) non-existent. I’m not sure what good it’ll do on my already crumbling mental health – I guess I’ll need to wait that one out.
Despite this small rant, I think it’s okay to be lonely sometimes. I think that it’s part of the human experience, whether we want to go through it or not. I’m awful at talking face to face as my social skills aren’t exactly up to speed, but I’m always up for a chat on social media if anyone feels like they need it!
Thank-you for reading – please check up on your friends, they might need you 🙂
(I’m not sure what the exact point of this post is – I guess I wanted to share some thoughts with you hahah, it was a slight impulse decision if I’m honest)